Holiness, Holiness is what I long for; holiness is what I need. Holiness, holiness is what You want for me. So take my heart and mold it. Take my mind, transform it. Take my will, conform it, to Yours, oh to Yours!
...................
"The holiness movements of today have none of the rugged reality of the New Testament about them. There is nothing about them that needs the death of Christ. All that is required is pious atmosphere, prayer and devotion."
~Oswald Chambers
I have been thinking much lately on the subject of holiness. What does holiness look like? How is it illustrated in my life? Where is it lacking in my life? What can I do to be more holy? What is keeping me from being holy?
At the same time I have pondering the work of the Holy Spirit in my life. Ironically enough, these two ponderings go hand in hand.
What does holiness look like? God. The Holy Spirit. Set apart. Separate. Different. I could go on. I think we all know what holiness is.
How is it illustrated in my life? In every choice that I make to be set apart for a higher calling. (Understanding that this is only accomplished by God's grace.)
Where is it lacking in my life? In every choice that I make not to be set apart. In every choice that I ignore my higher calling. Every choice that I settle for the mediocre.
What can i do to be more holy? Bad question. No. Really bad question. As people we can not "be" more holy. When we try to be holy all we accomplish is a "pious atmosphere, pious prayer and pious devotion"....that's a lot of piety, and last time I checked, piety was not what we were supposed to be going for in holiness. Piety is a lot of outward, self-seeking-praise conformity to the human definition of what looks good. That is not holiness. That is pride.
Speaking of Jesus Christ as an example vs. our Savior, Chambers goes on to say,
"There is only the idea that He (Jesus Christ) is our pattern. In the New Testament Jesus was the Savior long before He was the pattern. Today He is being portrayed as the figurehead of religion - a mere example. He is that- but He is infinitely more. He is salvation itself; He IS the gospel of God!"
You do not just wake up one day and decide, "Hey, that's it. I'm going to be holy from now on. I will be holy." Mission accomplished problems solved.
No. That is not how it works. Sure, we can try to look holy. But only the Spirit can work true holiness in our inner being. In 1 Peter, Peter says,
"...be holy in all your conduct....for it was written, You shall be holy for I am holy..."
Even looking back to the original text in Leviticus (chapt 11 to be precise) God says,
"...be holy for I am holy.... I am the Lord who brought you up out of Egypt to be your God, You shall be holy, for I am holy."
I always heard that as a command before. "You must be holy!" But looking at it now, I see that it is all a work of God. You will be holy. (notice, it is not a choice) How? Why? "For (because) I am holy." Because we are His and we have His Spirit living and breathing life into us, we can not help but be holy- for He is holy.
We become like an air freshener can. We are the can- He is the freshener. The can does not do anything but let out the scent. It is the scent that makes the difference in a room. The can cannot decide at the factory, "Hey, I'm gonna be an air freshener!" Much like we can not wake up one day and say, "Hey, I'm gonna be holy!" Only by the work of the Spirit are we transformed.
"By the renewing of your minds" Crucial moment!!!! We are transformed by the renewing of our minds. Meditating on Scripture. Meditating on the good and lovely. The righteous and just. The very character of God. That He would be both our Savior and our example- instead of just one or the other.
What is keeping me from being holy? The only thing that hinders holiness in me is when I decide to take the reigns over and try to lead the Spirit. We were created to be Spirit-led, not Spirit-leaders. Read that again.
We were created to be Spirit-led, not Spirit-leaders.
What a mess the world would be in if we were in control of the Spirit. If we made all the decisions before Him without the foreknowledge He has of His master plan. The only thing that hinders me from seeing His holiness poured out in my life is when I choose to "defile" (as Leviticus puts it) myself. To defile is to mar or spoil. I get the image of a clean shirt in my mind. A clean shirt because that is it's nature. A shirt is clean. Period. But then you spill coffee on it (not that there is ANYTHING wrong with coffee- if you know me, you know I think quite the opposite) and suddenly it is defiled. Coffee in and of itself is not harmful or bad, but when used inappropriately or unwisely it can ruin a perfectly beautiful outfit. You have to wash it before it can be used again.
We were created to be clean and holy. We must use everything around us with the utmost care. Anything at all- though in and of itself may not be harmful- could mar our image- an image given to us by God. It could become soiled and dirty. But just as a dirty shirt can be washed, so we can be washed and once again be clean and white, a true representation of a Holy God who called us and sanctified us to be His children.
May I be Spirit-led that His holiness would shine through in this dark and dirty world.
Thursday, November 29, 2012
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Good
"And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God and who are called according to His purpose"
~Romans 8:28
.....................
Once again I find myself broken before You. At the end of me.
How many times will I find myself here?
Broken not out of humility, but because of what I've done.
I failed to see You moving, so I took things into my own hands.
Now everything is spinning out of control
and those I love are suffering.
God, how do I fix this mess I've made?
How do I climb out of this pit I've dug?
Then I hear Him say, "Come to me all who are weary and need rest."
I go and He says, "Cast your cares on Me and I will give you rest. I know how you long to control things, but my child, leg me finish this good work I have begun. I promise it is good."
I lift my eyes and I see You there, standing right where I left You.
All those accusations I threw at You.
You weren't the one to abandon- I ran.
You weren't the one to stop loving- I was.
You weren't the one to lose control- I did.
Here I stand before You- once again.
Broken, but this time in awe of Your mercy and grace.
At the end of me, but not because of my stubbornness.
No, this time I gave me up.
Here I am broken and in awe.
This time know You are God.
I hear You say, "Come to me all you who are weary and need rest. Cast your cares on Me and I will give you rest. I know you long to control things, but my child, I am finishing this work that I began in you so long ago. Look- as I promised- it is always good."
So here I stay. Instead of looking to me,
I look at Your loving-kindness.
I see Your patience and faithfulness.
I hold on to Your hand, unsure if I can handle Your sheer beauty.
Your holiness and righteousness consumer me
And I know that You are working all these things in me and
You are finishing the work that You started in me.
And I know that it is good!
~Romans 8:28
.....................
Once again I find myself broken before You. At the end of me.
How many times will I find myself here?
Broken not out of humility, but because of what I've done.
I failed to see You moving, so I took things into my own hands.
Now everything is spinning out of control
and those I love are suffering.
God, how do I fix this mess I've made?
How do I climb out of this pit I've dug?
Then I hear Him say, "Come to me all who are weary and need rest."
I go and He says, "Cast your cares on Me and I will give you rest. I know how you long to control things, but my child, leg me finish this good work I have begun. I promise it is good."
I lift my eyes and I see You there, standing right where I left You.
All those accusations I threw at You.
You weren't the one to abandon- I ran.
You weren't the one to stop loving- I was.
You weren't the one to lose control- I did.
Here I stand before You- once again.
Broken, but this time in awe of Your mercy and grace.
At the end of me, but not because of my stubbornness.
No, this time I gave me up.
Here I am broken and in awe.
This time know You are God.
I hear You say, "Come to me all you who are weary and need rest. Cast your cares on Me and I will give you rest. I know you long to control things, but my child, I am finishing this work that I began in you so long ago. Look- as I promised- it is always good."
So here I stay. Instead of looking to me,
I look at Your loving-kindness.
I see Your patience and faithfulness.
I hold on to Your hand, unsure if I can handle Your sheer beauty.
Your holiness and righteousness consumer me
And I know that You are working all these things in me and
You are finishing the work that You started in me.
And I know that it is good!
Irony
"The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence"
...................
I was cooking in my kitchen last night (shocker, I know) Oh! It was pumpkin/parmesan pasta with rosemary. Really, really scrumptious. But I was cooking in my kitchen last night and all the lights were on. I know that sounds pretty normal for most of you, but I was without an overhead light in my kitchen for three months because the bulb went out and I could not find the correct bulb to replace the old one. Anyways, during those three months I got used to using the dim, yellow stove light. Horrible when you are trying to determine the color of chicken, or something that you are supposed to
"cook till golden brown"... I complained about not having a light for most of those three months (my poor roommates) and got even more frustrated when the stove light went out and I was reduced to using a Pixar looking desk lamp to illuminate the kitchen- talk about ghetto.
Well, about a month ago our landlord came by and fixed all the lights in the house (I was SO excited). I would turn the light on and just stand in the doorway for a little bit just enjoying the pure white light coming from the ceiling. It is a wonderful thing to be able to cook after dark and know what color the food is you are cooking. That is all I have to say about that.
However, last night when I was in the kitchen, I had a bit of a headache and my eyes were hurting from an especially long, exhausting day and I looked at the stove light and thought- "I kind of miss using that old, faithful, yellow light to cook by at night, it was kind of soothing..." And caught myself wondering why on earth I would ever want to go back to using that dingy light.
.......................
Last year I ran an after school program at a boarding school. I hated it. The school was affectionately known as the "school from hell". The kids did not care, the teachers did not care, and occasionally I found that I did not care. I hate not caring about things so I prayed fervently that God would give me a love for this place. Well, He did, and ironically I volunteered to work at the school this year teaching classes during the day. I went from having a max of 8 students at a time in an informal setting to having a minimum of 28 students in a classroom at a time.
I started out the venture in good spirits. High hopes of great achievements and huge hurdles being leaped over. I quickly lost my enthusiasm and found myself wishing that I had not volunteered for the position.
So there's this saying that I have always kind of hated,
"The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence"
But I guess sometimes it proves true. In both situations I found myself discontent with some factor of some sort. However I have not finished either story yet. You see, the grass may seem different and we can live our lives always chasing the other pasture, but then again, we can also make the most of what we have been given and find contentment.
In the case of the kitchen light... I find myself occasionally smiling as I turn off the main light in the kitchen and turn on the dingy stove light to finish dinner or make coffee or tea or something and enjoy a small seemingly insignificant pleasure that I only found by being forced to use the "sub-par".
In the case of the "school from hell".... I find myself frustrated out of my mind sometimes at the situations that present themselves on a daily basis among my 50+ students there ages 8-14 and my co-teachers who really want a break from the children, so they only support you as long as it does not cause them any more trouble. However, I have learned and in many ways am still learning to look at each little victory there and see God's hand moving and molding and changing me, my students, and my coworkers. When my "Bad students" write more neatly than my "good students" I get super excited....When I can get my "student that hates my guts" to acknowledge me and respond to a question I just about squeal into my microphone and jump up and down and praise them because it was good. No matter how small, it was good. There was progress. When a teacher gets concerned because it is a cold, wet, rainy day out and I am wearing short sleeves, my heart is warmed because it shows concern where there was once none. I honestly would not change schools if given the opportunity. I am honored that Daddy has placed me in such a difficult place and I know that in doing so I get to see Him work in some pretty amazing ways. I have come to love this place, and as much as I hate it sometimes (hmmm) I do, deep down inside, love it. =)
Ironic, isn't it?
No matter what the situation, no matter how big or how small, He is at work. He works all things for good according to His good pleasure and He sustains us through the "bad". He is our strong tower, the horn of our salvation, our shelter, our refuge- the lifter of our heads.
What situation do you find yourself in that you wish you could change? Maybe it is time to stop focusing on what you hate about the situation and choose to look at how God is using it to perfect you and work in those around you.
...................
I was cooking in my kitchen last night (shocker, I know) Oh! It was pumpkin/parmesan pasta with rosemary. Really, really scrumptious. But I was cooking in my kitchen last night and all the lights were on. I know that sounds pretty normal for most of you, but I was without an overhead light in my kitchen for three months because the bulb went out and I could not find the correct bulb to replace the old one. Anyways, during those three months I got used to using the dim, yellow stove light. Horrible when you are trying to determine the color of chicken, or something that you are supposed to
"cook till golden brown"... I complained about not having a light for most of those three months (my poor roommates) and got even more frustrated when the stove light went out and I was reduced to using a Pixar looking desk lamp to illuminate the kitchen- talk about ghetto.
Well, about a month ago our landlord came by and fixed all the lights in the house (I was SO excited). I would turn the light on and just stand in the doorway for a little bit just enjoying the pure white light coming from the ceiling. It is a wonderful thing to be able to cook after dark and know what color the food is you are cooking. That is all I have to say about that.
However, last night when I was in the kitchen, I had a bit of a headache and my eyes were hurting from an especially long, exhausting day and I looked at the stove light and thought- "I kind of miss using that old, faithful, yellow light to cook by at night, it was kind of soothing..." And caught myself wondering why on earth I would ever want to go back to using that dingy light.
.......................
Last year I ran an after school program at a boarding school. I hated it. The school was affectionately known as the "school from hell". The kids did not care, the teachers did not care, and occasionally I found that I did not care. I hate not caring about things so I prayed fervently that God would give me a love for this place. Well, He did, and ironically I volunteered to work at the school this year teaching classes during the day. I went from having a max of 8 students at a time in an informal setting to having a minimum of 28 students in a classroom at a time.
I started out the venture in good spirits. High hopes of great achievements and huge hurdles being leaped over. I quickly lost my enthusiasm and found myself wishing that I had not volunteered for the position.
So there's this saying that I have always kind of hated,
"The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence"
But I guess sometimes it proves true. In both situations I found myself discontent with some factor of some sort. However I have not finished either story yet. You see, the grass may seem different and we can live our lives always chasing the other pasture, but then again, we can also make the most of what we have been given and find contentment.
In the case of the kitchen light... I find myself occasionally smiling as I turn off the main light in the kitchen and turn on the dingy stove light to finish dinner or make coffee or tea or something and enjoy a small seemingly insignificant pleasure that I only found by being forced to use the "sub-par".
In the case of the "school from hell".... I find myself frustrated out of my mind sometimes at the situations that present themselves on a daily basis among my 50+ students there ages 8-14 and my co-teachers who really want a break from the children, so they only support you as long as it does not cause them any more trouble. However, I have learned and in many ways am still learning to look at each little victory there and see God's hand moving and molding and changing me, my students, and my coworkers. When my "Bad students" write more neatly than my "good students" I get super excited....When I can get my "student that hates my guts" to acknowledge me and respond to a question I just about squeal into my microphone and jump up and down and praise them because it was good. No matter how small, it was good. There was progress. When a teacher gets concerned because it is a cold, wet, rainy day out and I am wearing short sleeves, my heart is warmed because it shows concern where there was once none. I honestly would not change schools if given the opportunity. I am honored that Daddy has placed me in such a difficult place and I know that in doing so I get to see Him work in some pretty amazing ways. I have come to love this place, and as much as I hate it sometimes (hmmm) I do, deep down inside, love it. =)
Ironic, isn't it?
No matter what the situation, no matter how big or how small, He is at work. He works all things for good according to His good pleasure and He sustains us through the "bad". He is our strong tower, the horn of our salvation, our shelter, our refuge- the lifter of our heads.
What situation do you find yourself in that you wish you could change? Maybe it is time to stop focusing on what you hate about the situation and choose to look at how God is using it to perfect you and work in those around you.
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Found
Tall, short, fat, skinny, hyper, sedate, athletic, not-so-athletic, musical, not musical, artistic, not artistic, traveler, homebody, rocker, operatic.
So many options, so many expectations.
So many opinions.
.....................
So, I grew up around a lot of rules. I never realized it, but I grew up with SO many rules. All the way through college I was surrounded by strict rules.
"Wear this...don't wear this"
"Too short...too low"
"Listen to this kind of music....You can't listen to this kind of music- it's sinful"
"You can't say that!! What will they think of you??"
"Don't go to the movies, it is the appearance of evil"
"Don't sing like that, you sound too worldly"
"Look good on the outside...as long as you have that covered, you can make it by in life."
Okay, so that last one was never verbalized, but I think it was the overlying concept that I was struck by through my teenage and college years. Everything was so focused on appearance and pleasing your parents, your youth leader, pastor, church family, friends...the list could go on. It was never said that way for sure, but in the back of my mind, I always heard a voice asking me,
"What will they think of you if you do, say, wear, etc. that?"
I think it might have had to do with a huge fear of rejection that I have had for years. I was petrified of making someone not like me, or worse yet disappointed in me. I was driven by fear of disappointing my parents and leaders/counselors. I would not make "bad" choices because I knew it would hurt them and could not bear to see them upset with me. My heart was far from the "right" choices so often though.
I wanted to be wild. I wanted to be rebellious. I wanted to be that strong, independent chick that nobody could touch. There was a certain mystery to that image in my mind. A strength and a refusal to accept hurt from anyone. It seemed more emotionally safe to live that way.
One thing that this mindset and heart attitude brought along with that "toughness" that I did not bargain for was an intense insecurity. I feared people. I feared their opinions of me. I feared pain that was beyond my control. I feared my own emotions and responses to things.
Really all my "strength" had done for me was create more areas of insecurity.
Since coming to China, Daddy's been dealing mercifully with me on so many levels relieving my fears and insecurities and giving me an identity in Him.
Now there's a phrase...."identity in Christ"
Ooooo, sounds legit, yes? I grew up hearing this phrase and knowing that when I accepted Christ I had an "identity in Him". It meant that I was a part of His family, I was made in His image, etc, etc, etc. What I didn't put together was that this "identity" was a personal identity. Unique and special to me. It meant that I would be different from other people. Different from friends and different from family.
Different.
Oh boy, now my old self did not like that word. Different meant people would point and laugh. They would think I was weird. They would make fun of me and talk behind my back. I did not like that.
Ironically, things are different now. I kind of welcome different. Why? Because I know that when I am different because Jesus made me that way and I follow Him alone and seek to please HIM. What people say or think really does not matter.
Sure. The Bible has PLENTY to say about wisdom in counsel from those who are walking according to His precepts, but ultimately this life is lived for my God. The law was put to death over 2,000 years ago! Why do we live today like it still exists to condemn us?
"For there is now therefore NO condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus."
Read it again. No, really. Read it again.
NO condemnation! I do not live my live in fear of condemnation of fear of my family or friends or anyone else in my life. I certainly do not live in fear of condemnation from my Father. What a freeing thought, isn't it?
"Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. If you're tired, and you are, there is freedom."
Not that rules are bad at all. Please do not take what I am saying that way. I am not saying that I despise my childhood, teenage years, or college. On the contrary. I am so very thankful for them. Lord knows I have no idea where I would be today without them. No. My point is simply this,
"I once was lost, but now I am found."
I no longer wonder who I am and why I do what I do. I no longer wonder why I like what I like and say what I say or wear what I wear. For the longest time, everything about me depended upon where I was, who I was with, etc. Now I do not fear rejection from those people because I know that my Father approves of me and why do I need any other approval?
I do not just want to "make it by" in life. I want to live and thrive. I want to love life and who God made me to be. And that, by God's grace, is what I aim to do!
So many options, so many expectations.
So many opinions.
.....................
So, I grew up around a lot of rules. I never realized it, but I grew up with SO many rules. All the way through college I was surrounded by strict rules.
"Wear this...don't wear this"
"Too short...too low"
"Listen to this kind of music....You can't listen to this kind of music- it's sinful"
"You can't say that!! What will they think of you??"
"Don't go to the movies, it is the appearance of evil"
"Don't sing like that, you sound too worldly"
"Look good on the outside...as long as you have that covered, you can make it by in life."
Okay, so that last one was never verbalized, but I think it was the overlying concept that I was struck by through my teenage and college years. Everything was so focused on appearance and pleasing your parents, your youth leader, pastor, church family, friends...the list could go on. It was never said that way for sure, but in the back of my mind, I always heard a voice asking me,
"What will they think of you if you do, say, wear, etc. that?"
I think it might have had to do with a huge fear of rejection that I have had for years. I was petrified of making someone not like me, or worse yet disappointed in me. I was driven by fear of disappointing my parents and leaders/counselors. I would not make "bad" choices because I knew it would hurt them and could not bear to see them upset with me. My heart was far from the "right" choices so often though.
I wanted to be wild. I wanted to be rebellious. I wanted to be that strong, independent chick that nobody could touch. There was a certain mystery to that image in my mind. A strength and a refusal to accept hurt from anyone. It seemed more emotionally safe to live that way.
One thing that this mindset and heart attitude brought along with that "toughness" that I did not bargain for was an intense insecurity. I feared people. I feared their opinions of me. I feared pain that was beyond my control. I feared my own emotions and responses to things.
Really all my "strength" had done for me was create more areas of insecurity.
Since coming to China, Daddy's been dealing mercifully with me on so many levels relieving my fears and insecurities and giving me an identity in Him.
Now there's a phrase...."identity in Christ"
Ooooo, sounds legit, yes? I grew up hearing this phrase and knowing that when I accepted Christ I had an "identity in Him". It meant that I was a part of His family, I was made in His image, etc, etc, etc. What I didn't put together was that this "identity" was a personal identity. Unique and special to me. It meant that I would be different from other people. Different from friends and different from family.
Different.
Oh boy, now my old self did not like that word. Different meant people would point and laugh. They would think I was weird. They would make fun of me and talk behind my back. I did not like that.
Ironically, things are different now. I kind of welcome different. Why? Because I know that when I am different because Jesus made me that way and I follow Him alone and seek to please HIM. What people say or think really does not matter.
Sure. The Bible has PLENTY to say about wisdom in counsel from those who are walking according to His precepts, but ultimately this life is lived for my God. The law was put to death over 2,000 years ago! Why do we live today like it still exists to condemn us?
"For there is now therefore NO condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus."
Read it again. No, really. Read it again.
NO condemnation! I do not live my live in fear of condemnation of fear of my family or friends or anyone else in my life. I certainly do not live in fear of condemnation from my Father. What a freeing thought, isn't it?
"Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. If you're tired, and you are, there is freedom."
Not that rules are bad at all. Please do not take what I am saying that way. I am not saying that I despise my childhood, teenage years, or college. On the contrary. I am so very thankful for them. Lord knows I have no idea where I would be today without them. No. My point is simply this,
"I once was lost, but now I am found."
I no longer wonder who I am and why I do what I do. I no longer wonder why I like what I like and say what I say or wear what I wear. For the longest time, everything about me depended upon where I was, who I was with, etc. Now I do not fear rejection from those people because I know that my Father approves of me and why do I need any other approval?
I do not just want to "make it by" in life. I want to live and thrive. I want to love life and who God made me to be. And that, by God's grace, is what I aim to do!
Saturday, November 3, 2012
Motive
I love to bring a smile to someone. I love to make someone feel loved.
.....................
In his book Desiring God, John Piper brings out the definition of hedonism. Doing something with the motive of finding true joy and happiness out of whatever the act or service, word of encouragement, or touch of love we do or give. In short, his ultimate joy and happiness is found in the happiness of God, as he says,
"The chief end of man is to glorify God by enjoying Him forever".
In other words, the best way to glorify God is by simply enjoying Him, the world He created, the gifts and talents He's given, the people He works through, etc. Where am I going with this? Piper talks in his book about when you love someone, it makes you happy to to make them happy. If you think about it, this is really true. I remember my own father telling me that he loved to give us kids gifts, and how he found so much joy in watching us open gifts on birthdays and Christmas'.
I find that I get the most joy out of the smiles, contented sighs after a good meal, a word of thanks, or the look of gratitude that says, "I really needed that right now." I also find that my lowest "feeling" moments are shortly after I pour myself out for someone. Instant gratification and contentendness comes after doing whatever it is that I have done, but give it a few hours, and without fail, I am feeling sad, low, and lonely.
After pondering this for quite some time, I have come to the conclusion that when I do not feel "refilled" after pouring myself out for someone, I just continue to feel empty. This is where Piper's book comes back into play.
The ultimate joy, happiness and fulfillment comes from enjoying Him. It comes in looking to Him to fill us up instead of waiting for those around us to pour into us, which they may or may not have already done. I tend to have very high expectations of people, though and have learned that people seldom reach my expectations. When that happens, I normally plummet into questioning what I did wrong, or what I could have done better- instead of sitting quietly with my Jesus, just enjoying His company.
"For whatever you do....do it to the glory of God,"
So whatever I do, whether I sit and talk with a friend for a few hours, or cook someone a special meal, or clean something for someone, or set aside a time to spend with someone, whatever it is- I must do first unto the Lord. Using my gifts and talents to bring the glory and honor to Him, and then to the person. Only then will I find my truest joy and fulfillment in Him.
It is easy to "do" for people and for God, but do you really find your fulfillment in all that doing? Take a minute and examine your joy level. Is it lacking because you have been waiting for a special person to fill you up or overflowing because you have done your all to His glory- as unto Him.
Peace and love. And joy. :)
.....................
In his book Desiring God, John Piper brings out the definition of hedonism. Doing something with the motive of finding true joy and happiness out of whatever the act or service, word of encouragement, or touch of love we do or give. In short, his ultimate joy and happiness is found in the happiness of God, as he says,
"The chief end of man is to glorify God by enjoying Him forever".
In other words, the best way to glorify God is by simply enjoying Him, the world He created, the gifts and talents He's given, the people He works through, etc. Where am I going with this? Piper talks in his book about when you love someone, it makes you happy to to make them happy. If you think about it, this is really true. I remember my own father telling me that he loved to give us kids gifts, and how he found so much joy in watching us open gifts on birthdays and Christmas'.
I find that I get the most joy out of the smiles, contented sighs after a good meal, a word of thanks, or the look of gratitude that says, "I really needed that right now." I also find that my lowest "feeling" moments are shortly after I pour myself out for someone. Instant gratification and contentendness comes after doing whatever it is that I have done, but give it a few hours, and without fail, I am feeling sad, low, and lonely.
After pondering this for quite some time, I have come to the conclusion that when I do not feel "refilled" after pouring myself out for someone, I just continue to feel empty. This is where Piper's book comes back into play.
The ultimate joy, happiness and fulfillment comes from enjoying Him. It comes in looking to Him to fill us up instead of waiting for those around us to pour into us, which they may or may not have already done. I tend to have very high expectations of people, though and have learned that people seldom reach my expectations. When that happens, I normally plummet into questioning what I did wrong, or what I could have done better- instead of sitting quietly with my Jesus, just enjoying His company.
"For whatever you do....do it to the glory of God,"
So whatever I do, whether I sit and talk with a friend for a few hours, or cook someone a special meal, or clean something for someone, or set aside a time to spend with someone, whatever it is- I must do first unto the Lord. Using my gifts and talents to bring the glory and honor to Him, and then to the person. Only then will I find my truest joy and fulfillment in Him.
It is easy to "do" for people and for God, but do you really find your fulfillment in all that doing? Take a minute and examine your joy level. Is it lacking because you have been waiting for a special person to fill you up or overflowing because you have done your all to His glory- as unto Him.
Peace and love. And joy. :)
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