"And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God and who are called according to His purpose"
~Romans 8:28
.....................
Once again I find myself broken before You. At the end of me.
How many times will I find myself here?
Broken not out of humility, but because of what I've done.
I failed to see You moving, so I took things into my own hands.
Now everything is spinning out of control
and those I love are suffering.
God, how do I fix this mess I've made?
How do I climb out of this pit I've dug?
Then I hear Him say, "Come to me all who are weary and need rest."
I go and He says, "Cast your cares on Me and I will give you rest. I know how you long to control things, but my child, leg me finish this good work I have begun. I promise it is good."
I lift my eyes and I see You there, standing right where I left You.
All those accusations I threw at You.
You weren't the one to abandon- I ran.
You weren't the one to stop loving- I was.
You weren't the one to lose control- I did.
Here I stand before You- once again.
Broken, but this time in awe of Your mercy and grace.
At the end of me, but not because of my stubbornness.
No, this time I gave me up.
Here I am broken and in awe.
This time know You are God.
I hear You say, "Come to me all you who are weary and need rest. Cast your cares on Me and I will give you rest. I know you long to control things, but my child, I am finishing this work that I began in you so long ago. Look- as I promised- it is always good."
So here I stay. Instead of looking to me,
I look at Your loving-kindness.
I see Your patience and faithfulness.
I hold on to Your hand, unsure if I can handle Your sheer beauty.
Your holiness and righteousness consumer me
And I know that You are working all these things in me and
You are finishing the work that You started in me.
And I know that it is good!
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Irony
"The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence"
...................
I was cooking in my kitchen last night (shocker, I know) Oh! It was pumpkin/parmesan pasta with rosemary. Really, really scrumptious. But I was cooking in my kitchen last night and all the lights were on. I know that sounds pretty normal for most of you, but I was without an overhead light in my kitchen for three months because the bulb went out and I could not find the correct bulb to replace the old one. Anyways, during those three months I got used to using the dim, yellow stove light. Horrible when you are trying to determine the color of chicken, or something that you are supposed to
"cook till golden brown"... I complained about not having a light for most of those three months (my poor roommates) and got even more frustrated when the stove light went out and I was reduced to using a Pixar looking desk lamp to illuminate the kitchen- talk about ghetto.
Well, about a month ago our landlord came by and fixed all the lights in the house (I was SO excited). I would turn the light on and just stand in the doorway for a little bit just enjoying the pure white light coming from the ceiling. It is a wonderful thing to be able to cook after dark and know what color the food is you are cooking. That is all I have to say about that.
However, last night when I was in the kitchen, I had a bit of a headache and my eyes were hurting from an especially long, exhausting day and I looked at the stove light and thought- "I kind of miss using that old, faithful, yellow light to cook by at night, it was kind of soothing..." And caught myself wondering why on earth I would ever want to go back to using that dingy light.
.......................
Last year I ran an after school program at a boarding school. I hated it. The school was affectionately known as the "school from hell". The kids did not care, the teachers did not care, and occasionally I found that I did not care. I hate not caring about things so I prayed fervently that God would give me a love for this place. Well, He did, and ironically I volunteered to work at the school this year teaching classes during the day. I went from having a max of 8 students at a time in an informal setting to having a minimum of 28 students in a classroom at a time.
I started out the venture in good spirits. High hopes of great achievements and huge hurdles being leaped over. I quickly lost my enthusiasm and found myself wishing that I had not volunteered for the position.
So there's this saying that I have always kind of hated,
"The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence"
But I guess sometimes it proves true. In both situations I found myself discontent with some factor of some sort. However I have not finished either story yet. You see, the grass may seem different and we can live our lives always chasing the other pasture, but then again, we can also make the most of what we have been given and find contentment.
In the case of the kitchen light... I find myself occasionally smiling as I turn off the main light in the kitchen and turn on the dingy stove light to finish dinner or make coffee or tea or something and enjoy a small seemingly insignificant pleasure that I only found by being forced to use the "sub-par".
In the case of the "school from hell".... I find myself frustrated out of my mind sometimes at the situations that present themselves on a daily basis among my 50+ students there ages 8-14 and my co-teachers who really want a break from the children, so they only support you as long as it does not cause them any more trouble. However, I have learned and in many ways am still learning to look at each little victory there and see God's hand moving and molding and changing me, my students, and my coworkers. When my "Bad students" write more neatly than my "good students" I get super excited....When I can get my "student that hates my guts" to acknowledge me and respond to a question I just about squeal into my microphone and jump up and down and praise them because it was good. No matter how small, it was good. There was progress. When a teacher gets concerned because it is a cold, wet, rainy day out and I am wearing short sleeves, my heart is warmed because it shows concern where there was once none. I honestly would not change schools if given the opportunity. I am honored that Daddy has placed me in such a difficult place and I know that in doing so I get to see Him work in some pretty amazing ways. I have come to love this place, and as much as I hate it sometimes (hmmm) I do, deep down inside, love it. =)
Ironic, isn't it?
No matter what the situation, no matter how big or how small, He is at work. He works all things for good according to His good pleasure and He sustains us through the "bad". He is our strong tower, the horn of our salvation, our shelter, our refuge- the lifter of our heads.
What situation do you find yourself in that you wish you could change? Maybe it is time to stop focusing on what you hate about the situation and choose to look at how God is using it to perfect you and work in those around you.
...................
I was cooking in my kitchen last night (shocker, I know) Oh! It was pumpkin/parmesan pasta with rosemary. Really, really scrumptious. But I was cooking in my kitchen last night and all the lights were on. I know that sounds pretty normal for most of you, but I was without an overhead light in my kitchen for three months because the bulb went out and I could not find the correct bulb to replace the old one. Anyways, during those three months I got used to using the dim, yellow stove light. Horrible when you are trying to determine the color of chicken, or something that you are supposed to
"cook till golden brown"... I complained about not having a light for most of those three months (my poor roommates) and got even more frustrated when the stove light went out and I was reduced to using a Pixar looking desk lamp to illuminate the kitchen- talk about ghetto.
Well, about a month ago our landlord came by and fixed all the lights in the house (I was SO excited). I would turn the light on and just stand in the doorway for a little bit just enjoying the pure white light coming from the ceiling. It is a wonderful thing to be able to cook after dark and know what color the food is you are cooking. That is all I have to say about that.
However, last night when I was in the kitchen, I had a bit of a headache and my eyes were hurting from an especially long, exhausting day and I looked at the stove light and thought- "I kind of miss using that old, faithful, yellow light to cook by at night, it was kind of soothing..." And caught myself wondering why on earth I would ever want to go back to using that dingy light.
.......................
Last year I ran an after school program at a boarding school. I hated it. The school was affectionately known as the "school from hell". The kids did not care, the teachers did not care, and occasionally I found that I did not care. I hate not caring about things so I prayed fervently that God would give me a love for this place. Well, He did, and ironically I volunteered to work at the school this year teaching classes during the day. I went from having a max of 8 students at a time in an informal setting to having a minimum of 28 students in a classroom at a time.
I started out the venture in good spirits. High hopes of great achievements and huge hurdles being leaped over. I quickly lost my enthusiasm and found myself wishing that I had not volunteered for the position.
So there's this saying that I have always kind of hated,
"The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence"
But I guess sometimes it proves true. In both situations I found myself discontent with some factor of some sort. However I have not finished either story yet. You see, the grass may seem different and we can live our lives always chasing the other pasture, but then again, we can also make the most of what we have been given and find contentment.
In the case of the kitchen light... I find myself occasionally smiling as I turn off the main light in the kitchen and turn on the dingy stove light to finish dinner or make coffee or tea or something and enjoy a small seemingly insignificant pleasure that I only found by being forced to use the "sub-par".
In the case of the "school from hell".... I find myself frustrated out of my mind sometimes at the situations that present themselves on a daily basis among my 50+ students there ages 8-14 and my co-teachers who really want a break from the children, so they only support you as long as it does not cause them any more trouble. However, I have learned and in many ways am still learning to look at each little victory there and see God's hand moving and molding and changing me, my students, and my coworkers. When my "Bad students" write more neatly than my "good students" I get super excited....When I can get my "student that hates my guts" to acknowledge me and respond to a question I just about squeal into my microphone and jump up and down and praise them because it was good. No matter how small, it was good. There was progress. When a teacher gets concerned because it is a cold, wet, rainy day out and I am wearing short sleeves, my heart is warmed because it shows concern where there was once none. I honestly would not change schools if given the opportunity. I am honored that Daddy has placed me in such a difficult place and I know that in doing so I get to see Him work in some pretty amazing ways. I have come to love this place, and as much as I hate it sometimes (hmmm) I do, deep down inside, love it. =)
Ironic, isn't it?
No matter what the situation, no matter how big or how small, He is at work. He works all things for good according to His good pleasure and He sustains us through the "bad". He is our strong tower, the horn of our salvation, our shelter, our refuge- the lifter of our heads.
What situation do you find yourself in that you wish you could change? Maybe it is time to stop focusing on what you hate about the situation and choose to look at how God is using it to perfect you and work in those around you.
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Found
Tall, short, fat, skinny, hyper, sedate, athletic, not-so-athletic, musical, not musical, artistic, not artistic, traveler, homebody, rocker, operatic.
So many options, so many expectations.
So many opinions.
.....................
So, I grew up around a lot of rules. I never realized it, but I grew up with SO many rules. All the way through college I was surrounded by strict rules.
"Wear this...don't wear this"
"Too short...too low"
"Listen to this kind of music....You can't listen to this kind of music- it's sinful"
"You can't say that!! What will they think of you??"
"Don't go to the movies, it is the appearance of evil"
"Don't sing like that, you sound too worldly"
"Look good on the outside...as long as you have that covered, you can make it by in life."
Okay, so that last one was never verbalized, but I think it was the overlying concept that I was struck by through my teenage and college years. Everything was so focused on appearance and pleasing your parents, your youth leader, pastor, church family, friends...the list could go on. It was never said that way for sure, but in the back of my mind, I always heard a voice asking me,
"What will they think of you if you do, say, wear, etc. that?"
I think it might have had to do with a huge fear of rejection that I have had for years. I was petrified of making someone not like me, or worse yet disappointed in me. I was driven by fear of disappointing my parents and leaders/counselors. I would not make "bad" choices because I knew it would hurt them and could not bear to see them upset with me. My heart was far from the "right" choices so often though.
I wanted to be wild. I wanted to be rebellious. I wanted to be that strong, independent chick that nobody could touch. There was a certain mystery to that image in my mind. A strength and a refusal to accept hurt from anyone. It seemed more emotionally safe to live that way.
One thing that this mindset and heart attitude brought along with that "toughness" that I did not bargain for was an intense insecurity. I feared people. I feared their opinions of me. I feared pain that was beyond my control. I feared my own emotions and responses to things.
Really all my "strength" had done for me was create more areas of insecurity.
Since coming to China, Daddy's been dealing mercifully with me on so many levels relieving my fears and insecurities and giving me an identity in Him.
Now there's a phrase...."identity in Christ"
Ooooo, sounds legit, yes? I grew up hearing this phrase and knowing that when I accepted Christ I had an "identity in Him". It meant that I was a part of His family, I was made in His image, etc, etc, etc. What I didn't put together was that this "identity" was a personal identity. Unique and special to me. It meant that I would be different from other people. Different from friends and different from family.
Different.
Oh boy, now my old self did not like that word. Different meant people would point and laugh. They would think I was weird. They would make fun of me and talk behind my back. I did not like that.
Ironically, things are different now. I kind of welcome different. Why? Because I know that when I am different because Jesus made me that way and I follow Him alone and seek to please HIM. What people say or think really does not matter.
Sure. The Bible has PLENTY to say about wisdom in counsel from those who are walking according to His precepts, but ultimately this life is lived for my God. The law was put to death over 2,000 years ago! Why do we live today like it still exists to condemn us?
"For there is now therefore NO condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus."
Read it again. No, really. Read it again.
NO condemnation! I do not live my live in fear of condemnation of fear of my family or friends or anyone else in my life. I certainly do not live in fear of condemnation from my Father. What a freeing thought, isn't it?
"Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. If you're tired, and you are, there is freedom."
Not that rules are bad at all. Please do not take what I am saying that way. I am not saying that I despise my childhood, teenage years, or college. On the contrary. I am so very thankful for them. Lord knows I have no idea where I would be today without them. No. My point is simply this,
"I once was lost, but now I am found."
I no longer wonder who I am and why I do what I do. I no longer wonder why I like what I like and say what I say or wear what I wear. For the longest time, everything about me depended upon where I was, who I was with, etc. Now I do not fear rejection from those people because I know that my Father approves of me and why do I need any other approval?
I do not just want to "make it by" in life. I want to live and thrive. I want to love life and who God made me to be. And that, by God's grace, is what I aim to do!
So many options, so many expectations.
So many opinions.
.....................
So, I grew up around a lot of rules. I never realized it, but I grew up with SO many rules. All the way through college I was surrounded by strict rules.
"Wear this...don't wear this"
"Too short...too low"
"Listen to this kind of music....You can't listen to this kind of music- it's sinful"
"You can't say that!! What will they think of you??"
"Don't go to the movies, it is the appearance of evil"
"Don't sing like that, you sound too worldly"
"Look good on the outside...as long as you have that covered, you can make it by in life."
Okay, so that last one was never verbalized, but I think it was the overlying concept that I was struck by through my teenage and college years. Everything was so focused on appearance and pleasing your parents, your youth leader, pastor, church family, friends...the list could go on. It was never said that way for sure, but in the back of my mind, I always heard a voice asking me,
"What will they think of you if you do, say, wear, etc. that?"
I think it might have had to do with a huge fear of rejection that I have had for years. I was petrified of making someone not like me, or worse yet disappointed in me. I was driven by fear of disappointing my parents and leaders/counselors. I would not make "bad" choices because I knew it would hurt them and could not bear to see them upset with me. My heart was far from the "right" choices so often though.
I wanted to be wild. I wanted to be rebellious. I wanted to be that strong, independent chick that nobody could touch. There was a certain mystery to that image in my mind. A strength and a refusal to accept hurt from anyone. It seemed more emotionally safe to live that way.
One thing that this mindset and heart attitude brought along with that "toughness" that I did not bargain for was an intense insecurity. I feared people. I feared their opinions of me. I feared pain that was beyond my control. I feared my own emotions and responses to things.
Really all my "strength" had done for me was create more areas of insecurity.
Since coming to China, Daddy's been dealing mercifully with me on so many levels relieving my fears and insecurities and giving me an identity in Him.
Now there's a phrase...."identity in Christ"
Ooooo, sounds legit, yes? I grew up hearing this phrase and knowing that when I accepted Christ I had an "identity in Him". It meant that I was a part of His family, I was made in His image, etc, etc, etc. What I didn't put together was that this "identity" was a personal identity. Unique and special to me. It meant that I would be different from other people. Different from friends and different from family.
Different.
Oh boy, now my old self did not like that word. Different meant people would point and laugh. They would think I was weird. They would make fun of me and talk behind my back. I did not like that.
Ironically, things are different now. I kind of welcome different. Why? Because I know that when I am different because Jesus made me that way and I follow Him alone and seek to please HIM. What people say or think really does not matter.
Sure. The Bible has PLENTY to say about wisdom in counsel from those who are walking according to His precepts, but ultimately this life is lived for my God. The law was put to death over 2,000 years ago! Why do we live today like it still exists to condemn us?
"For there is now therefore NO condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus."
Read it again. No, really. Read it again.
NO condemnation! I do not live my live in fear of condemnation of fear of my family or friends or anyone else in my life. I certainly do not live in fear of condemnation from my Father. What a freeing thought, isn't it?
"Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. If you're tired, and you are, there is freedom."
Not that rules are bad at all. Please do not take what I am saying that way. I am not saying that I despise my childhood, teenage years, or college. On the contrary. I am so very thankful for them. Lord knows I have no idea where I would be today without them. No. My point is simply this,
"I once was lost, but now I am found."
I no longer wonder who I am and why I do what I do. I no longer wonder why I like what I like and say what I say or wear what I wear. For the longest time, everything about me depended upon where I was, who I was with, etc. Now I do not fear rejection from those people because I know that my Father approves of me and why do I need any other approval?
I do not just want to "make it by" in life. I want to live and thrive. I want to love life and who God made me to be. And that, by God's grace, is what I aim to do!
Saturday, November 3, 2012
Motive
I love to bring a smile to someone. I love to make someone feel loved.
.....................
In his book Desiring God, John Piper brings out the definition of hedonism. Doing something with the motive of finding true joy and happiness out of whatever the act or service, word of encouragement, or touch of love we do or give. In short, his ultimate joy and happiness is found in the happiness of God, as he says,
"The chief end of man is to glorify God by enjoying Him forever".
In other words, the best way to glorify God is by simply enjoying Him, the world He created, the gifts and talents He's given, the people He works through, etc. Where am I going with this? Piper talks in his book about when you love someone, it makes you happy to to make them happy. If you think about it, this is really true. I remember my own father telling me that he loved to give us kids gifts, and how he found so much joy in watching us open gifts on birthdays and Christmas'.
I find that I get the most joy out of the smiles, contented sighs after a good meal, a word of thanks, or the look of gratitude that says, "I really needed that right now." I also find that my lowest "feeling" moments are shortly after I pour myself out for someone. Instant gratification and contentendness comes after doing whatever it is that I have done, but give it a few hours, and without fail, I am feeling sad, low, and lonely.
After pondering this for quite some time, I have come to the conclusion that when I do not feel "refilled" after pouring myself out for someone, I just continue to feel empty. This is where Piper's book comes back into play.
The ultimate joy, happiness and fulfillment comes from enjoying Him. It comes in looking to Him to fill us up instead of waiting for those around us to pour into us, which they may or may not have already done. I tend to have very high expectations of people, though and have learned that people seldom reach my expectations. When that happens, I normally plummet into questioning what I did wrong, or what I could have done better- instead of sitting quietly with my Jesus, just enjoying His company.
"For whatever you do....do it to the glory of God,"
So whatever I do, whether I sit and talk with a friend for a few hours, or cook someone a special meal, or clean something for someone, or set aside a time to spend with someone, whatever it is- I must do first unto the Lord. Using my gifts and talents to bring the glory and honor to Him, and then to the person. Only then will I find my truest joy and fulfillment in Him.
It is easy to "do" for people and for God, but do you really find your fulfillment in all that doing? Take a minute and examine your joy level. Is it lacking because you have been waiting for a special person to fill you up or overflowing because you have done your all to His glory- as unto Him.
Peace and love. And joy. :)
.....................
In his book Desiring God, John Piper brings out the definition of hedonism. Doing something with the motive of finding true joy and happiness out of whatever the act or service, word of encouragement, or touch of love we do or give. In short, his ultimate joy and happiness is found in the happiness of God, as he says,
"The chief end of man is to glorify God by enjoying Him forever".
In other words, the best way to glorify God is by simply enjoying Him, the world He created, the gifts and talents He's given, the people He works through, etc. Where am I going with this? Piper talks in his book about when you love someone, it makes you happy to to make them happy. If you think about it, this is really true. I remember my own father telling me that he loved to give us kids gifts, and how he found so much joy in watching us open gifts on birthdays and Christmas'.
I find that I get the most joy out of the smiles, contented sighs after a good meal, a word of thanks, or the look of gratitude that says, "I really needed that right now." I also find that my lowest "feeling" moments are shortly after I pour myself out for someone. Instant gratification and contentendness comes after doing whatever it is that I have done, but give it a few hours, and without fail, I am feeling sad, low, and lonely.
After pondering this for quite some time, I have come to the conclusion that when I do not feel "refilled" after pouring myself out for someone, I just continue to feel empty. This is where Piper's book comes back into play.
The ultimate joy, happiness and fulfillment comes from enjoying Him. It comes in looking to Him to fill us up instead of waiting for those around us to pour into us, which they may or may not have already done. I tend to have very high expectations of people, though and have learned that people seldom reach my expectations. When that happens, I normally plummet into questioning what I did wrong, or what I could have done better- instead of sitting quietly with my Jesus, just enjoying His company.
"For whatever you do....do it to the glory of God,"
So whatever I do, whether I sit and talk with a friend for a few hours, or cook someone a special meal, or clean something for someone, or set aside a time to spend with someone, whatever it is- I must do first unto the Lord. Using my gifts and talents to bring the glory and honor to Him, and then to the person. Only then will I find my truest joy and fulfillment in Him.
It is easy to "do" for people and for God, but do you really find your fulfillment in all that doing? Take a minute and examine your joy level. Is it lacking because you have been waiting for a special person to fill you up or overflowing because you have done your all to His glory- as unto Him.
Peace and love. And joy. :)
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Cherish the Food
The sweet, tangy, salty scent drifted into my nostrils and the smooth gooey sauce tantalized my tongue, the carrots were cooked just right. I had never had such a strange combination of flavors in one dish that created such perfection.
..................
Red wine and dark soy sauce....
Sound gross? Yeah. It is definitely one of the most random delightful, savory combinations I have ever tasted. So good. Amazing. Delicious. Mind-blowing.
Try this on for size...
In a pan cook up some chopped up chicken in lemon, garlic, white wine, black pepper combination and then add your capers. Once the meat is sufficiently cooked and tender, add it into a pot of cooked penne pasta and add your alfredo sauce. Mix the left over lemon, white wine sauce in and BAM! Italian in your face.
OOO!! More beta carotine for you!
Cut carrots into smallish wedges and coat in olive oil, salt, pepper, garlic, cayenne pepper, and either Indian seasoning (for a more exotic flavor) or Chipotle seasoning (for a more smokey fall flavor). Roast on each side in an oven for 20 min a side. Then die as you savor each sweet, smokey, spicy wedge of healthiness.
Mmmkk. So I live in China. Better add something Chinese to this list....
Noodles- I love noodles. So much. So cook those nice thin rice noodles in a pot of chicken flavored water. On the side in a frying pan cook up some eggs with some fresh chopped garlic, salt, and cracked pepper. Then take the eggs out and in the same pan cook up some fresh tomato chunks. After the tomatoes are soft mix all the ingredients in with the noodles and serve as your favorite cold evening comfort food- almost as good as mac'n'cheese.....
.....almost.
Wait! There's more!!
You know, every time I went to the fair as a child, someone got an elephant ear- they were amazing. I loved them. I loved them so much. Just before moving over seas, my sister and I went to the Florida State fair and me, not knowing when the next time I would be at an American fair decided to go all out and get multiple cups of sweet tea, popcorn, cotton candy, a turkey leg, funnel cake, and I do not even remember what else. My sister thought I was crazy, but I thought, "Hey, might as well enjoy it while I have it in front of me!!" (My bank account was not too thrilled with me though by the time I left the fair that night)...
Well. Someone had the amazing idea to make elephant ear pull apart bread. Hello. Brilliant much?
The whole process takes a bit of time, and I am not too keen on baking, but wow.
Warm, gooey, cinnamony, sugary goodness makes the wait SO worth it. Especially with a cup of coffee in hand and eggs in a basket on the side- gives that sweet/salty combination that makes for a killer breakfast!
K, so I'm done raving about how much I love food. I think you get the picture. The point of my passionate explanation about all these uh-mazing dishes is this... Some Chinese friends told me as I was going on about their wine/soy sauce brilliance, to "Cherish the food".
Jokingly, I told them I liked the phrase so much that I was going to title my next blog that. Well, here it is. :) No, really though. We were talking how people do not view cooking as an art so much any more. There is not that creativity poured out over the stove or oven any more. It's, "quick, whip something up cause we are too busy to enjoy something truly good and nutritious!"
I hate that. I love to enjoy savory, good-for-you food. I love it so very much.
Then I started thinking about it. And I transferred the thought away from food into the rest of my life. What do I cherish? What do I savor? I am quite passionate about my cooking, but am I that passionate about my Jesus? I am passionate about music, but am I passionate about Scripture memory? I am passionate about sports, but am I passionate about studying the Word and diligently searching to be more like Christ?
I know the answers to most of these questions. I know that I love my Jesus, I know that I long to know Him more. I know that I desire to drink of the well and drink in His wisdom to shape and guide my life. But I also know that there is a lack of diligence in my life.
Just like it takes practice, courage and work to perfect a recipe, instrument, or sport, so it takes practice, courage and work to maintain a good relationship with God. Keeping in mind that in ourselves dwells no good thing, so always giving credit to our Creator for the grace to grow more like Him...And just like I do not always get a recipe right, and occasionally I make a bad pass on the field (but only occasionally :P ), and sometimes I play the wrong note or chord, I do not always get it right in life. But that is okay- My Savior loves me anyway and just like when my roommates give me a second chance in the kitchen, my Father gives me many chances at whatever He gives me to do. (Best part about Him, though is that He walks me through the whole process. :)
Back to the phrase, "Cherish the food". I always thought this phrase meant, "savor, enjoy, embrace..." the food....then I found out that it means, "be thankful and do not waste the food because we did not always have an abundance of food" (referring back to historical events in China when food was scarce). This also should impact our view of God. Cherish Him. We did not always have His light in our lives. We were once lost in darkness, we did not know what it was like to have His Word in our hearts, lighting our paths, revealing our insecurities and giving promises abundantly.
"Hallelujah, all I have is Christ, Hallelujah, Jesus is my life!"
Cherish the Word.
Cherish Christ.
..................
Red wine and dark soy sauce....
Sound gross? Yeah. It is definitely one of the most random delightful, savory combinations I have ever tasted. So good. Amazing. Delicious. Mind-blowing.
Try this on for size...
In a pan cook up some chopped up chicken in lemon, garlic, white wine, black pepper combination and then add your capers. Once the meat is sufficiently cooked and tender, add it into a pot of cooked penne pasta and add your alfredo sauce. Mix the left over lemon, white wine sauce in and BAM! Italian in your face.
OOO!! More beta carotine for you!
Cut carrots into smallish wedges and coat in olive oil, salt, pepper, garlic, cayenne pepper, and either Indian seasoning (for a more exotic flavor) or Chipotle seasoning (for a more smokey fall flavor). Roast on each side in an oven for 20 min a side. Then die as you savor each sweet, smokey, spicy wedge of healthiness.
Mmmkk. So I live in China. Better add something Chinese to this list....
Noodles- I love noodles. So much. So cook those nice thin rice noodles in a pot of chicken flavored water. On the side in a frying pan cook up some eggs with some fresh chopped garlic, salt, and cracked pepper. Then take the eggs out and in the same pan cook up some fresh tomato chunks. After the tomatoes are soft mix all the ingredients in with the noodles and serve as your favorite cold evening comfort food- almost as good as mac'n'cheese.....
.....almost.
Wait! There's more!!
You know, every time I went to the fair as a child, someone got an elephant ear- they were amazing. I loved them. I loved them so much. Just before moving over seas, my sister and I went to the Florida State fair and me, not knowing when the next time I would be at an American fair decided to go all out and get multiple cups of sweet tea, popcorn, cotton candy, a turkey leg, funnel cake, and I do not even remember what else. My sister thought I was crazy, but I thought, "Hey, might as well enjoy it while I have it in front of me!!" (My bank account was not too thrilled with me though by the time I left the fair that night)...
Well. Someone had the amazing idea to make elephant ear pull apart bread. Hello. Brilliant much?
The whole process takes a bit of time, and I am not too keen on baking, but wow.
Warm, gooey, cinnamony, sugary goodness makes the wait SO worth it. Especially with a cup of coffee in hand and eggs in a basket on the side- gives that sweet/salty combination that makes for a killer breakfast!
K, so I'm done raving about how much I love food. I think you get the picture. The point of my passionate explanation about all these uh-mazing dishes is this... Some Chinese friends told me as I was going on about their wine/soy sauce brilliance, to "Cherish the food".
Jokingly, I told them I liked the phrase so much that I was going to title my next blog that. Well, here it is. :) No, really though. We were talking how people do not view cooking as an art so much any more. There is not that creativity poured out over the stove or oven any more. It's, "quick, whip something up cause we are too busy to enjoy something truly good and nutritious!"
I hate that. I love to enjoy savory, good-for-you food. I love it so very much.
Then I started thinking about it. And I transferred the thought away from food into the rest of my life. What do I cherish? What do I savor? I am quite passionate about my cooking, but am I that passionate about my Jesus? I am passionate about music, but am I passionate about Scripture memory? I am passionate about sports, but am I passionate about studying the Word and diligently searching to be more like Christ?
I know the answers to most of these questions. I know that I love my Jesus, I know that I long to know Him more. I know that I desire to drink of the well and drink in His wisdom to shape and guide my life. But I also know that there is a lack of diligence in my life.
Just like it takes practice, courage and work to perfect a recipe, instrument, or sport, so it takes practice, courage and work to maintain a good relationship with God. Keeping in mind that in ourselves dwells no good thing, so always giving credit to our Creator for the grace to grow more like Him...And just like I do not always get a recipe right, and occasionally I make a bad pass on the field (but only occasionally :P ), and sometimes I play the wrong note or chord, I do not always get it right in life. But that is okay- My Savior loves me anyway and just like when my roommates give me a second chance in the kitchen, my Father gives me many chances at whatever He gives me to do. (Best part about Him, though is that He walks me through the whole process. :)
Back to the phrase, "Cherish the food". I always thought this phrase meant, "savor, enjoy, embrace..." the food....then I found out that it means, "be thankful and do not waste the food because we did not always have an abundance of food" (referring back to historical events in China when food was scarce). This also should impact our view of God. Cherish Him. We did not always have His light in our lives. We were once lost in darkness, we did not know what it was like to have His Word in our hearts, lighting our paths, revealing our insecurities and giving promises abundantly.
"Hallelujah, all I have is Christ, Hallelujah, Jesus is my life!"
Cherish the Word.
Cherish Christ.
Saturday, October 20, 2012
The Calm
When winds are raging o'er the upper ocean,
And billows wild contend with angry roar,
'Tis said, far down beneath the wild commotion,
That peaceful Stillness reigneth evermore.
Far, far beneath, the noise of the tempest diet,
And silver waves chime ever peacefully,
And no rude storm, how fierce soe'er it flieth,
Disturbs the Sabbath of that deeper sea.
So to the heart that knows Thy love, O Purest,
There is a temple sacred evermore,
And all the babble of life's angry voices
Dies in hushed silence at its peaceful door.
Far, far away, the roar of passion dieth,
And loving thoughts rise calm and peacefully,
And no rude storm, how fierce soe'er it flieth
Disturbs the soul that dwells, O Lord, in Thee.
-Harriet Beecher Stowe
...........................
Possibly my new favorite poem right now. I was reading a devotional on Philippians 4:7 this weekend and it talked about an ultimate calm beneath any tumultuous circumstance. They called it the "cushion of the sea". Paul calls it the "peace that surpasses understanding", meaning the ultimate peace in your inner being that assures you that while your world is seemingly spinning violently out of control, you are still safe in the Father's arms,
This peace is a peace that cannot be explained. It "surpasses understanding" as Paul says, it guards our hearts, our feelings, our emotions our thoughts, and our minds. Every part of our human existence is affected by this peace. While many people respond to their situations with fear, uncertainty, anxiety, anger, frustration, or depression, we have the knowledge of the love of Christ that will perfect us unto every good and perfect work.
I am so thankful as I look at my own life to see that ultimate guiding peace that has been limitlessly supplied by my gracious Father. Regardless of the time of life: the age, the school, the house, the church, the city, the country, the continent... I have been comforted and held in the palm of His hand- in the shadow of the Almighty God.
And so we see that we do not walk this path alone. We walk it guided and cared for by our loving Shepherd. The same One who if we stray is faithful to lead us back to the fold, will protect us even when we are stubborn, and love on us no matter what we have done. What an awesome thought of our omnipotent, holy God as our loving Shepherd!
This being said and marveled on, I think it is important to remember that these truths apply to those who find their home in Him. Stowe writes,
"And no rude storm, how fierce so'er it flieth, disturbs the soul that dwells, O Lord, in Thee."
Note that last phrase..."disturbs the soul that dwells...in Thee" The only way we can dwell in Him is by finding Him where He is and choosing to stay there. Choosing to meditate on His words, choosing to find safety in His promises, and then choosing to hide ourselves in those truths. Capturing every thought and bringing them unto the subjection of our loving Father.
It is here that we find peace. It is here we find understanding. It is here that we find true fulfillment and joy.
"He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the Shadow of the Almighty."
"He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the Shadow of the Almighty."
Sunday, October 14, 2012
Altar to God
The Israelites were instructed to build altars in the places where God made Himself very real to them.
Wherever He provided what they needed.
Wherever He conquered their giants.
Wherever He saved their lives.
.............................
I went to Haiti about a year and a half ago. I remember that trip being one of the most difficult trips out of the country that I ever took.
The country was hard, the people were hard, and the team did not seem as unified as I had wanted. I was asked to go as a leader on the team and took that very seriously. I wanted to do the best I could for God in that position. I wanted to facilitate a good experience for each team member and see the most work done at the orphanage we were at as possible.
Needless to say, things did not go quite as I had expected, planned or hoped for.
We were met by difficulties at every corner. Financial difficulties getting there, luggage difficulties once we got there, language barriers and lack of communication caused things to go "spiraling out of control". By the end of the trip, I saw God's hand moving, I saw Him working and I slowly learned to let go of my plans and ideas. Just before we left, I noticed some beautiful smooth stones on the ground. I bent over and picked them up. Dirty? Yes. But something prompted me to clean them off and take them home.
Every country I visit I take a souvenir home to remember it by. Haiti being....well, Haiti, did not have many souvenirs. I took the stones to remember what God had done in Haiti and in my heart in Haiti. I stacked them up in my room and it became my altar to God's faithfulness. Since then, I have thought about altars many times and marked moments in my life that serve as an altar to His grace.
Yesterday I went to my old apartment here in China to visit some friends. My first real "home" when I got here. I almost instantly got all sentimental as I thought back to all the many memories I had there (I was only there for 3 months, but a lot can happen in 3 months!!!). I walked out to the balcony and looked over the familiar scene, smelled the familiar smells, and heard the familiar sound of children playing in the street. In the background I heard songs being played of God's faithfulness to His children.
As I looked out over that familiar scene, tears welled up in my eyes. I thought back to the many trials I had faced while in that apartment and how God had always been faithful to carry me through. I thought of how many things He taught me since I left that apartment and looked at the person I have become since I first set foot in that little apartment. Tears spilled out as I thanked God for His grace and love and mercy to me in the last eight months. I could not think of a thing to say, but "Thank you".
The one thought that kept coming back to me was, "I would not trade any of this for anything in the world. I do not wish that it had happened any other way."
All the time that I was experiencing trials and months of growth and deep weeding in my heart...all the times I wished there was another way to grow....All the times I thought He did not know what He was doing...He was right there, at work in me, and holding my hand beside me.
I was talking to a friend earlier that day about my experiences in the last year with working in the States and my journey here to China and the familiar Jeremiah 29:11 came up.
"For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."
I am so thankful for a God, Father, and Friend who already knows my next move, who is planning to give me a life that glorifies Him and one that is full of hope. Now, whenever I go back to that happy apartment that is so much like home to me, I will remember it as an altar to God's faithfulness to me and His people here.
He is so good. He is so faithful. He is so loving. He is so gracious.
He deserves our remembrance! I would encourage you to mark out altars to God of remembrance for His sovereignty to you. It will amaze and humble you, and strengthen you as you face the trials of today.
He will never leave His children. He will never forsake them. He never has. He never will.
Wherever He provided what they needed.
Wherever He conquered their giants.
Wherever He saved their lives.
.............................
I went to Haiti about a year and a half ago. I remember that trip being one of the most difficult trips out of the country that I ever took.
The country was hard, the people were hard, and the team did not seem as unified as I had wanted. I was asked to go as a leader on the team and took that very seriously. I wanted to do the best I could for God in that position. I wanted to facilitate a good experience for each team member and see the most work done at the orphanage we were at as possible.
Needless to say, things did not go quite as I had expected, planned or hoped for.
We were met by difficulties at every corner. Financial difficulties getting there, luggage difficulties once we got there, language barriers and lack of communication caused things to go "spiraling out of control". By the end of the trip, I saw God's hand moving, I saw Him working and I slowly learned to let go of my plans and ideas. Just before we left, I noticed some beautiful smooth stones on the ground. I bent over and picked them up. Dirty? Yes. But something prompted me to clean them off and take them home.
Every country I visit I take a souvenir home to remember it by. Haiti being....well, Haiti, did not have many souvenirs. I took the stones to remember what God had done in Haiti and in my heart in Haiti. I stacked them up in my room and it became my altar to God's faithfulness. Since then, I have thought about altars many times and marked moments in my life that serve as an altar to His grace.
Yesterday I went to my old apartment here in China to visit some friends. My first real "home" when I got here. I almost instantly got all sentimental as I thought back to all the many memories I had there (I was only there for 3 months, but a lot can happen in 3 months!!!). I walked out to the balcony and looked over the familiar scene, smelled the familiar smells, and heard the familiar sound of children playing in the street. In the background I heard songs being played of God's faithfulness to His children.
As I looked out over that familiar scene, tears welled up in my eyes. I thought back to the many trials I had faced while in that apartment and how God had always been faithful to carry me through. I thought of how many things He taught me since I left that apartment and looked at the person I have become since I first set foot in that little apartment. Tears spilled out as I thanked God for His grace and love and mercy to me in the last eight months. I could not think of a thing to say, but "Thank you".
The one thought that kept coming back to me was, "I would not trade any of this for anything in the world. I do not wish that it had happened any other way."
All the time that I was experiencing trials and months of growth and deep weeding in my heart...all the times I wished there was another way to grow....All the times I thought He did not know what He was doing...He was right there, at work in me, and holding my hand beside me.
I was talking to a friend earlier that day about my experiences in the last year with working in the States and my journey here to China and the familiar Jeremiah 29:11 came up.
"For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."
I am so thankful for a God, Father, and Friend who already knows my next move, who is planning to give me a life that glorifies Him and one that is full of hope. Now, whenever I go back to that happy apartment that is so much like home to me, I will remember it as an altar to God's faithfulness to me and His people here.
He is so good. He is so faithful. He is so loving. He is so gracious.
He deserves our remembrance! I would encourage you to mark out altars to God of remembrance for His sovereignty to you. It will amaze and humble you, and strengthen you as you face the trials of today.
He will never leave His children. He will never forsake them. He never has. He never will.
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